The First Time : a poem, a memory, a feeling.
The first time I saw you
You were wearing black.
You walked straight past me
Not knowing, not caring, not wanting.
You smiled as you got to the door
And just as you opened it
You looked back.
The first time we kissed
Was in your car
Under the flickering street lamp
Not planning, not understanding, not concerned.
And then you dropped me home
And left me alone.
The first time we made love
It lasted the entire night
Gripping. Hungry. And raw.
Not spoken, not comprehended, not defended.
And when the dawn broke
Our other life began.
The first time you said goodbye
I cried my heart out
Till I could feel nothing anymore.
Not realizing, not believing, not speaking.
The senses stood still for a long time
And then it didn’t matter anymore.
The first time I remembered you
Was when it rained today.
Soaking my clothes, touching my skin, caressing my face.
Not with consent. Not with concern. Not with consequence.
Just like, you had taken my heart.
The first time you saw me.