FROM FLING TO RING : A true story

A break up is never easy. But when you’ve broken up with a billionaire it feels even worse. When Sumit left me, I was shattered. Not only had I lost out on the empire that was rightfully mine after dating him for four years, I was left man less at an age when I should have been planning a wedding and babies. It had not been easy to catch the billionaire. He came from a billionaire family and I came from a middle class background. So I nurtured him, and groomed him and made him chase me just enough for him to want me for a long time. I was so sure that he was wrapped around my little finger. So it came as a shock when he showed me another one and went with what his mother said and got married to another billionaire girl.

I was left in the lurch. Heartbroken and humiliated. It was then that I met another man. Kanishk was his name. He had just graduated from an MBA and had been placed in the same MNC I was working in. Now obviously having a romance with him was wrong on both counts. First, you never have an office fling and secondly you never date on the rebound. One is only supposed to have multiple flings on the rebound. Therefore, that is what I thought I would do. I would have a fling with this man and then move on to someone else.

But Kanishk was a persistent person. He would get us movie tickets even before I could make plans to go with anyone else and reserve seats at the newest bars even before I wanted to go. He was smitten by me and vice versa. We started having a wonderful time together and I could see that the fling that I had wanted was turning into a romance that would last a long time.

So I did what I thought was the only practical solution. “I think we should break up.”I said to him matter of factly one morning.

He was flummoxed, not knowing what he had done wrong.  I clarified it for him in the nicest way I could. “It’s not you. It’s me.” I knew it sounded clichéd as soon as I said it so I explained further, “I just got over a breakup. I was trying to find my bearings and I don’t know if I want to commit again so soon.”

He nodded his head in a very understanding manner and said, “Well do you want to see other people?”He asked.

“Yes!” I said too eagerly.

“Alright.” He replied with some patience, “But are there `other’ people you know you want to see?” he asked.

And I thought about it. How could there have been when he was breathing down my neck every minute of every day? We worked together, we travelled together, and we partied together. Where was the room for anyone else to come into my life?

“Not really Kanishk but maybe I need to explore a little more to know if this is what I want.” I said hesitantly.

He nodded and said he would give me two months to figure out what I wanted. Moreover, if he found someone else in the time period, he would have the choice to break up as well. I thought this was only fair.

So I called my girlfriends and asked them to fix me up with whomever they knew. Alankrita told me flat out, “Are you mad? You’ve got a nice, decent boy who loves you and you want to go find other jerks?”

“So does this mean you’re not going to help me?” I asked. I could only hear the dead receiver at the end of the line.

“Ya my cousin is available,” said Samantha, “But he’s a vegetarian and doesn’t drink and goes to Church every Sunday and expects his wife, if you choose to be her, to do the same.”

“Wife?” I asked incredulously, “Whoever said anything about a wife?” I had just wanted a few more flings.

“You obviously wouldn’t date someone if you didn’t want it to `go somewhere’ eventually would you Megs? And you wouldn’t play with my brother’s feeling now would you?” demanded Sam who’s tone went into a high pitch.

I finally went on a blind date. As soon as the man picked me up, he asked me a hundred times where I wanted to go. When I suggested something, he didn’t want to eat the cuisine. He was a Gemini who couldn’t make up his mind. All through the evening there seemed to be something wrong with him though I couldn’t put my finger on it. It wasn’t as if he wasn’t a nice guy but his jokes didn’t impress me, nor did his intelligence. It was as if I was playing a twenty- question game to get to know him better. By the end of the evening, I realized that maybe for all my gusto in having many flings, deep down I didn’t want them. I wanted just one man.

And to find the “Perfect Man” I would be flitting from one bar to another, a hobby class to another and pleading with girlfriends to find me a man who loved me and made me laugh when I already had one who was devoted to me. Just because I had a good relationship immediately after a break up didn’t mean it was only a fling.

So I went back to Kanishk well before the separation time was over in the hope that he had not found anyone. I met him for coffee after work. He seemed nonchalant and quiet so I started speaking, “Kanishk, I’m sorry. I have been a fool. Do you want to go out again?” I requested bluntly and earnestly.

He was quiet for a long time. Then he replied, “No Megs. I don’t want to go out again.”

I was crestfallen. My eyes welled up with tears. I knew my stupid, spontaneous behavior would make me do something that I would regret forever and that day had come.

Kanishk started smiling slowly and said with a twinkle in his eye, “I don’t want to go out with you…I want to marry you! I wanted you to have the space to realize what you wanted. However, I always knew what I wanted. And I know now that you’ve tried to find the different men and failed. So you won’t do it after we’re married!” he said cockily.

Kanishk and I have been married for over 8 years. I learnt later that my friends plotted not to find other men for me. And today I am so glad that they didn’t. Sometimes rebound relationships are the ones that give you the greatest happiness.