A Note From My Diary: My Book, My Fears.

The most daunting thing for me is the blank word document.

It stares at me every morning, taunting me, teasing me, mocking me. It plays into my deepest fears that I'm not a good enough writer. That no one really cares about what I say. And that no one will read my book.
And then I start.
I type away furiously. I bring life into characters, a plot that comes from an organic growth and scenes that jump out from my brain. I dig deeper into my experiences, my life, stories and anecdotes. I write and I write, defying the blank word document till I'm exhausted.
And then I go out and meet people, share a part of me, listen, grow and learn.
And i come back and write some more. I understand that characters can be in  new situations, more scenes, and they can also act in strange ways. I think about what she is going through, how he is feeling and what they said.
All of it is me. Each and every character is a part of me.
And I think about them for days, weeks and months, sometimes waking in the middle of the night because "she" needs to say something to her hero. It needs to be written then. It can't wait till the morning.
Some days I stare blankly at the word doument and curse it. It has won for the day. I have not written.
And then I know it takes a little time.
And I start again. I try. I hope. I pray. I write.
And one day it lies in my hands. My book.
And I can only cry. Tears of joy, frustration, happiness, anxiety, nervousness and amazement.
I did it. I didn't succumb to my fear. And it's here. My book. MY book!
And I can only pray now that people will like it, will relate to it, will identify with it, will take something from it.
Because I've given a year of my life to make it happen. Every day putting a part of me onto every page. And I hope it gives them as much happiness as it gave me to write it.

The Women Who Inspired My Debut Novel: Losing My Virginity And Other Dumb Ideas

In an era of sexual liberation, to find women who have chosen to remain virgins well after their third decade is a rarity. But in India, there are many women who still believe that virginity is a non-issue. They mock the land of the Kama Sutra, and the sexual urban jungle of the metros where people are discovering themselves and new positions. They scoff at the idea of having fun for the sake of it. They are even immune to the pressures of their peers who have told them the wonderful stories, the great revelation of finding the big “O” or even the perfect man and time for losing their virginity. These women are unfazed. Sex is a no-show. And even if they are 30 and above, they do not care.

These are the women who inspired my novel Losing My Virginity and Other Dumb Ideas. After my encounters with them, I realized that the hype over losing one’s virginity is not just an Indian phenomenon. Women across the globe have the same issues. Age doesn’t matter. The search for the true love, a perfect man or the correct time is what is most important to the women. And even if they were lonely at the end of the day, they would rather hold on to their belief than be impulsive with their principles.

Vasudha’s Story:

Vasudha was a walking paradox. She earned a five-figure salary, had lived in New York, London and Honk Kong, owned her own luxury car and had bought her mother a house in Delhi. She was slim, pretty and uber successful. Yet she was a virgin. I had never met a woman like that. She didn’t care what people thought about. She lived on her own terms and was extremely corporate. None of her friends discussed their sex lives with her and she never mentioned her love life to them.

But I always wondered why she would be so rigid about her sexuality at the ripe old age of 33.

She told me the reason one day when we had a few glasses of wine and were listening to Harry Belafonte. She said it very quietly, “I think it’s cheap.”

“What is?” I asked.

“Sex.” She said softly. She couldn’t even say it clearly. We had never spoken about it. But I prodded with the opportunity, “But don’t you feel the urge sometimes?”

“No.” she answered adamantly, “ I have never felt the urge. There was a boy once when I was 17…we kissed and all but then, I thought I was too young and wanted to be the legal age before doing anything. Then there was Bharat when I was 24 but as soon as I said I’m not ready to sleep with him, he left me. As if that was the only thing, he wanted from me. I figured all men were the same.”

I could see now where Vasudha came from. She was scared of being rejected. But that wasn’t the only problem. There was more. A lot more.

She continued, “No there is no urge. If you’ve never tasted caviar, how do you know if you want it?” She asked hypothetically. I remained quiet. “I’m conservative. Very conservative. I think I’m the only one in this country who believes in morals and traditions.” She said emphatically. “What is it with all these women who want to go sleeping around? I think even holding hands is abominable. Public display of affection has taken on a completely new meaning. It never used to happen earlier. And now you see people kissing at airports, making out in movie halls, having sex before marriage. Doesn’t anyone have any self respect anymore?”

I could not argue. She was old fashioned I thought. She told her mother everything about her relationships and her feelings. Everything! And her mother believed she was doing the right thing. Her mother thought she should wait.

Vasudha was very judgmental. Here I was judging her for being this weird woman in the 21^st century who was 33 and still a virgin and she was judging me on being the opposite. According to me, a modern woman was supposed to be completely sexually evolved by the time she hit her third decade. She could take on men and the world because she knew everything. But Vasudha was a successful modern woman who held on to her values, and her conviction and  decided she would wait until she got married to lose her virginity. And no amount of cajoling would change her mind. I could see that this was not a good thing though. She was getting frustrated, angry, and cynical. She needed some emotional support. And she was scared. She was frightened into giving her heart to a man who might ask for something she wasn’t ready to give to him. Vasudha’s morality had become her biggest dilemma.

Adya’s Story:

“I’ve never had a boyfriend.” said Adya most languorously. She sat with her elbow on the table munching on a muffin. Adya was 31 and a Virgin. She was intelligent and successful but she had one slight problem. She was 20 kilos overweight. And no matter how many people said it wasn’t a problem to find a man, she thought it was a problem.

Besides the weight issue, Adya had been stuck in the same bank job since she graduated from an MBA school. She had moved up the ranks and had achieved almost the highest degree at her international bank job. But since she went to the same place for the last ten years, she never met anyone apart from work. And she never found anyone at work to have a romance with. She could not move her job since at such a high position there was a dearth of good jobs available and there were no “good” men in her office.

“Why don’t you join yoga,” I suggested lightly.

She looked at me as if I was an alien, “Who has the time? I leave at eight in the morning and come back at ten at night. I work most weekends and travel every alternate week. There’s no time for yoga or anything else.” We remained quiet until she spoke again, “Look I know about my weight. I know that I have body issues. I can’t strip in front of a man. So even if I’ve gone out in groups with people, I can’t make myself to get any further. I don’t know if a man really likes me.”

“Why wouldn’t any man like you Adya?” I implored at her illogical self.

“Because I don’t know if he wants me as pity thing or if he really likes me.” I was going to say that’s absurd but I didn’t. Adya was fixed in her thinking. She was not going to lose weight so easily and she wasn’t going to sleep with a man until she did. She was stuck in a predicament that she had made for herself. Until she lost either her weight or her issues with being fat, I didn’t think that Adya would be losing her virginity any time soon.

Zara’s Tale:

Zara was not successful. She didn’t come from a conservative background. And she wasn’t fat. She was just scared. Zara was an ordinary looking woman who had many male admirers since she presented herself well. She wore bright clothes that went with her exuberant personality and she had a beautiful smile. She was not overly witty or intelligent. She was a secretary at a television channel that meant that most days she had a ten to seven job. Unlike Vasudha who lived in Delhi with her mother, and Adya who lived alone, Zara lived with her best friend in a one-room apartment in Mumbai and had plenty of opportunity to lose her virginity. But at 30, she was still a virgin.

Zara had an older sister who was married and lived in USA. She however had lost her virginity at a very young age and it was this experience that had scarred Zara. Zara would have been thirteen when her elder sister came back home and told her all about it. The pain, the blood, and the hype that was called sex. Zara was sworn to silence. But over the next few days the sensitive girl realized that if her sister who had been so excited about it once upon a time could not really care so much about sex, why should she? And this thought remained. It remained for the next seventeen years.

Over the years whenever Zara asked her friends to describe their “first time” it was always with words that said “pain” or “blood” or “no big deal” and Zara soon got to thinking that she need not lose her virginity unless it was absolutely imperative to do so. She was not prudish. She had no qualms about her friends making love over the countryside. She just did not believe that she had that much courage to do so herself.

She was attracted to men and vice versa but she kept her distance,

One day I asked her, “Wouldn’t you have to lose it once you get married? Don’t you want to have kids?”

She said very rationally, “Yes I have no problems with that. But I’m in no hurry to get married or have kids. I can wait it out a few more years.”

Zara was so frightened about the act itself that she hid behind the excuse of not finding the right man. And no matter how much I tried to show her the beautiful side of losing one’s virginity she was convinced that when it would happen, she would think it was no big deal anyway.

 

If you have a story that you would like to share. Please write in to me on the blog or email and I will be happy to publish or respond to it.

Love Guru Advice: Husband Buys Me Ugly Clothes!

Dear Love Guru,
My husband buys me very expensive clothes that I don’t like! He hates my choice and insists I wear what he gets me. It’s stressing me out.

Sincerely,

Suman

Dear Suman,

Are the expensive clothes that bad? Many women would be happy if their husbands shopped for them. It shows he cares. Having said that, if you really don’t like the clothes, you can exchange them for what you do like. If you can’t do that, make an excuse for not wearing them all the time. Maybe fibbing about not getting the blouse made for the sari he bought, or that your office doesn’t like such colours, or even that you’ve lost weight and need to get it altered could discontinue his insistence and maintain peace in the house. You might need to give in to his choice occasionally. For a family function where all his relatives would be, you should ask him what you can wear and he will feel he’s participating in your dressing. Maybe at the function you can confide in your husband’s relative saying you feel awkward in the clothes he has bought and maybe an outside perspective would discourage him from buying you more stuff that is expensive. They can then talk to him about it. You can also go shopping with your husband where both of you can come to a common decision about clothes. Have a nice lavish lunch afterwards to make up for the arguments you may have. And if you still don’t like your clothes, you can always donate them to charity!

 

Mistakes Like Love And Sex video

Numerology for Names

Chaldean Numerology:
Calculate the number your name adds up to. Ideally if it matches the date you were born, it is supposed to be lucky!

1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8
A	B	C	D	E	U	O	F
I	K	G	M	H	V	Z	P
J	R	L	T	N	W
Q		S		X
Y

Points To Remember           

1 to 9 are single numbers and are called, 'Principal' or 'Root' or 'Single' numbers. All numbers beyond these 9 become 'Double' or 'Compound' numbers also known as 'Spiritual' numbers.

  

The Single or Root numbers denote what the human being they represent appears to be in the eyes of his/her fellow beings.

The Double or Compound numbers reveal the hidden influences that play a silent role behind the scenes. They foreshadow the future and foretell of the hidden shadows of the destiny of man.

    

SINGLE NUMBERS

No. 1 Positive Aspect Planet: Sun, Father, Male, Active and individual. Originality, dynamisms, the beginning, egotism, self reliance, positivism, power, distinction, potent energy urges, determination, tenaciousness of purpose, pride, ambition, intention, quick grasping power, complete and quick recovery after even the most serious of illnesses. Great authority and aspirations, research and vigour.

Negative Aspect Hard and unrelenting, unemotional and materialistic, blunt and mean especially the number 1 women. Inflated ego with a bloated sense of self worth, aloofness, domination, impertinence, rigidity, pride, pomp and showing off, braggart, splurges money wastefully.

No 2 Positive Aspects Planet: Moon, Mother, Female, Passive and Dual. Increase, relationships, psychic attraction, Emotions, Mentality, sympathy, antipathy, doubts, vacillation, medicine, house keeper, manager, sub-ordinate, moderation, restraint, psychic powers, intuition, literary capabilities, artistic talents, resourcefulness, power over the mind, capable of controlling the unbalanced, more than one profession, mutability and purity. Fellowship, humanity, honesty, imagination, simplicity and idealistic.

Negative Aspects Coldness, envy, jealousy, haste, shyness, double mindedness, whimsical, vacillating, mean, petty, feminine traits in the man, hasty. Deceitful and untrustworthy, instable, indolent, imitative rather than original, apes and copies slavishly, enslaves self to environment.

No 3 Positive Aspect Planet: Jupiter, expansive, Fair, Judge, Trinity and Teacher of the God's. Increase, intelligence, capable, expansive, travel, trade, judgmental, wealth, riches, power, luxuries and enriched mental faculties. Has mental refinement, faultless judgment, originality, independent thought, master organizer, always well dressed, especially the number 3 women, thoroughness, orthodoxy, conventionality and conscientiousness. Ambition, dignity, philosophy and prestige.

Negative Aspects Too critical, meticulous, pettiness and nagging tendencies especially in the women, self righteous, cruelty, dictatorship, hypocrisy, spendthrift, egotist and vain, false pride and a boastful nature.

No 4 Positive Aspects Planet: Uranus, the first solid material number, property, real estate, possessions, materialism, realization, credibility, position, universally motivated rather than personally, has luck, critical insight and adroitness and drives a good bargain. Have good livers, are contended souls with well-formed strong physiques and mentality. Home lovers, loyal to families, love of children and responsible for their families. Are methodical, reliable, energetic, active and have great endurance.

Negative Aspects Changeable, slow moving, slow approaching, causing delays, dominating, stubborn, vindictive, highly jealous and possessive of their partners to the extent of falsely doubting their loyalty. Sometimes like sloth bears, unkempt and badly dressed, luxury loving without having the desire to work for it and earn it, inertia, over passivity, doubtful and unbelieving, pig headed with little or no interest in the spiritual side of life. Material to the core.

No 5. Positive Aspects Planet: Mercury, Quick Silver, Movement and Communication. Has reason, logic, speech, ethics, born traveler, commerce, trade, utility, gambling and speculation is a great weakness and they will bet on the number plate of passing cars as well. Money, Bankers, Financiers, Singers. Changeable, blow hot blow cold, extremists, arrogant and unpredictable. Active, restless, full of vim and grit, ambitious, wisdom, warm affections, strongest attraction for the opposite sex than any other number, interest in casual affairs, zest for life, desire to see it all and live life to the fullest. Have co-operation, practicality, vigilance and shrewdness.

Negative Aspects Lack of perseverance and persistence, Skeptical, unreliable, unpredictable, rash and impulsive, too many iron rods in the fire, lacks precision and focussed planning, vacillates and is indecisive about all matters. Can be mean and petty in money matters.

No 6 Positive Aspects Planet: Venus, Love, Harmony, Peace, Marriage, Beauty and Luxury. Have co-operation, relationship, matrimony, reciprocity, sympathy, humanity, Sensuality and pleasure seeking. Make good wives as well as mothers and sensual lovers, good home keepers and companions. Have deep thinking and reasoning power, logic, investigation, intuitiveness, inquisitiveness, deduction, appreciation for others, loves a quiet life and is not rigid but open to convincing. Excellent memories. All Fine Arts such as Actors, Singers, Dancers, Writers and Musicians.

Negative Aspects No foresight and future planning, living in the now, trusting blindly, timid where action is called for, shy, moody, not methodical, infidel and unreliable with a weakness for the opposite sex but more on the romantic plane than the gross material. Comfort seekers and luxury lovers.

No 7 Positive Aspects Planet: Neptune/Moon, Love, Sensitivity and Photostat Memories. Have brains, equilibrium, agreements, deals, contracts, bargains, treaties, art, culture, occult, philosophy mother oriented, harmony, sentimentality, expansion and travel. Have austerity, deep reflection and fairness towards all humanity, peace, serenity, tolerance and philanthropy. Have Self-sacrifice, intensity of application, mutability; are founders of new religions and torchbearers to social reforms. Are Leaders in world affairs and seekers of the truth. They love the underdog and will fight 'to death' in the name of righteousness. Temperamental with a lean towards Occult and spiritualism

|Negative Aspects Whimsical, despondent, restless, prone to give in to unfounded and unjustified fears, Not such strong bodies, more on the tall, fair and lean side, Stubborn as mules, aggressive, impractical, weak in money matters, no proper financial provisions for the future, over sensitive, emotional and more unhappy than happy most of the time. Should stay away from alcohol and drugs totally.

No 8 Positive Aspect Planet: Saturn, Destiny, Fate, Karma and Resurrection. Systematic, organized, authority,, methodical, practical and steady. Progress, change, advancement, justice, home loving, premonitions, intuitive, occultist, psychic nature, education, learning, teaching, educationalist and philosophy. Loves animals, children, family and home. Has unselfish and sacrificing love for all humanity, hates monotony and makes a wonderful social worker. Succeeds in life through journeys and changes. Has a reconstruction power, rise of the Phoenix, happy old age, ever youthful, never aging and enlightened.

Negative Aspects Death, negation,, decay, delays, hardships, retardation, loss, extinction, late rewards and lack of stability. Are dreamers and not doers. Have cynicism, vindictiveness, nervousness and laziness. Have Karmic lessons to learn.

No 9 Positive Aspects Planet: Mars. Hot, Fiery, Dynamic, Fast, Male. Has activity, courage, enthusiasm energy, and sensuality and high drives. Is practical, inventive, scientific, specialist, responsibility, tact, diplomacy, sound judgement and strong intuition. Philosophical with artistic tendencies along with lucid expressions in orating and writing, good mechanics, especially 9 women make good and efficient kitchen mechanics. Has fire, anger, passion, penetration, power, enterprise and is family minded. Engineering, Science, Mechanics, Brains.

Negative Aspects Strife, infidelity, deceitful, despondent, presumptuous, destructive, erratic, fiery tempered, unreasonable, dominating, quarrelsome and impatient. Is prone to accidents from natural as well as unnatural calamities. Will have at least one surgery in a lifetime and should avoid alcohol and drugs.

COMPOUND NUMBERS

10, symbolised by the 'Wheel of Fortune', is a number of honour, faith, self -confidence and of rise and fall of fortunes. One's name can be known for good or for evil as one desires. It is a fortunate number in as much as that one's plans will be carried out successfully.

One is the number of the Sun and consciousness; Zero represents eternity and infinity. Zero brings struggle, which teaches number 10 Natives self-confidence and shows them life in its true perspective; it gives the right understanding and finally makes the Native successful and shine in life. It created many hidden enemies but number 1 alerts, recognises and fights off. 10 is the number of success after a long and hard struggle and must always be self-reliant, alert and introspective. Any kind of dependence on others causes many problems.10 can get fame or notoriety, depending upon the Native's character and will power. It is usually successful after the 46th year of life. It's a number of change, conversions and transmutations. These Natives dare to walk paths where only angels dread to tread. They are original, impressive, magnetic, knowledgeable and intelligent. This number gains materially from the in-laws, wife, own mother and father. Being slightly erratic, they upset their own applecart at times and risk the loss of position. They are a law unto themselves.

11 is a mysterious number to occultists. It warns of hidden dangers, trials, tribulations and treachery from others. It has the symbol of 'A Clenched Hand' and 'A Lion Muzzled'. The person representing it will have great difficulties to contend with. It's a Karmic number.

11 is composed of two 1's which is the number of the Sun. The 1 repeated twice in this compound makes its Native obstinate, revolutionary and authoritative. In Theology, 11 is a number of negative omens, sinners and penance. In Hindu religion, 11 is not negative but dynamic and auspicious. Psychic 2 born on the 11th of any month, though affected by the Moon can achieve commendable success in later life. 11 has the special sensitivity and intuition for feeling spiritual vibrations and seeing ghosts and spirits, for clairvoyance and trance mediumship. This number is successful in love and gets position and honour in life. Number 11 has potent powers and their vibrations reach out to others and they take control of almost every situation. They must beware for they make many secret enemies.

12 is a compound that signifies suffering and anxiety of the mind. It stands for sacrifice and the victim, and generally foreshadows being sacrificed for the plans of others.

Composed of the Sun (1) and the Moon (2), a pair of opposites but not opposing, this number which is 3, gets co-operation on all creative fronts. Though number 3 is lucky on all fronts, born on the 12th, one is never free from anxiety, stress and makes false promises. It says 'yes' to everything without meaning it, and finds itself in a soup; it is torn apart by the stable and unchanging determination of 1 and the ever changing opinions and duality of number 2. 12 born are impulsive, vacillating, unthinking, they leave most jobs midways and mess up their personal lives. They are extra sensitive and temperamental, sympathetic and understanding. They are physically attractive and overly attracted to the opposite sex. Quick to sacrifice for others they get victimized in the bargain. They are vain, proud, ambitious and aspiring. The Medical profession is well suited for them as is the field of Fine Arts.

This number indicates changes in one's plans and place, but is not as unfortunate as it is believed to be. In some ancient writings it is said,' He who understands the number 13 will be given power and dominion'. It is symbolised as the picture of a 'Skeleton' or 'Death', with a scythe reaping down men in a vast field which has fresh and new green grass. It is surrounded by young faces and heads cropping up from all around. It is the number of upheaval and destruction. It is also a symbol of power, which if wrongly used, will wreck destruction upon itself. It is the number of warning of the unknown and the unexpected, and one must tread very carefully if it appears in future calculations of dates and names.

13 is a Karmic compound and is composed of the Sun (1) and Jupiter. The Sun afflicts Jupiter, creating an irritable nature at the same time giving its benefic qualities to the Native. In the West and in China, number 13 is considered unlucky, in Mexico it is most auspicious, in Kabala it is very lucky and in India it is considered fortunate too. 13 Natives are alert, practical and dependable; they go to the core of the matter and leave no job half ways. They are successful scientists, occultists and can attain supernatural powers and 'Siddhis'. This number has precision, accuracy and efficiency, it could be well the number of a 'Genius'. They are independent, self-willed, methodical and happy only when in the 'driver's seat'. 13 is the number of undaunted courage as well as impulsiveness.

Their career and success in the true sense only commences after their 31st year of life.

 14 This is a number of movement, combination of people, things, dangers from natural calamities such as tempests, storms, water, fire and air. It is very fortunate for dealings with money, speculation and changes in business, though there is a strong element of risk and danger attached to it generally through the foolhardiness and actions of others. If this number comes out in ones calculations for future events, one is advised to exercise caution and prudence.

14 is a karmic compound. It is composed of the Sun (1) and Uranus (4), in the West, and Rahu 4, in India. It is the double number of the Sun and in Numerology it is still considered so. Rahu is the enemy of the Sun but since it is a 'Half Planet', it acts according to the nature of the planet it is associated with. In association with the Sun, its natural and opposing/opposite enemy, it tries to cause affliction. It partly eclipses the Sun and creates problems. Number 14 people suffer from more inner conflict, turmoil and face more changes in life than other Psychic 5 (Mercury) people. 5 is a gambler, but a 5 from a 14 is even more daring and takes undue risks, is more fluid, changeable and less jovial than Psychic 23. Number 14 should guard against natural calamities. Many of their desires and wishes are associated with money and are fortunate in money matters, they are successful business people. They may have romantic involvements early in life but are inconstant in love matters

15 This is a number of occult significance, mystery and magic, and as a rule does not represent the higher side of Occultism. Its meaning being that the person represented by it will use every art of magic to suit and carry out their purpose. If associated with a strong harmonious number, it can be very lucky and dynamic, but is associated with a peculiar number like 4 or 8, the person it represents will be unscrupulous and even use 'Black Magic' to gain and fulfil his/her desires.

It is associated with eloquent talkers, gifts of art and music, a dramatic and arresting personality, a voluptuous temperament, beautiful body and a very strong personal magnetism. It is very fortunate for money matters and obtaining gifts, favours and money from others. It also gives inheritance. This number often lands itself in trouble through the opposite sex and has more than just one physical involvement. It grabs more than its share of pleasures which eventually ends in emotional disappointment and total confusion.

15=6, 1 is Independence, 5 is freedom and 6 is love. The compound 15 is composed of the Sun (1) and Mercury (5); they are neutral as well as friendly with one another. This combination gives intellect, ready wit, modernism and material success, literature, fine arts and popularity. Number 15 receives more co-operation, festivity, love and luxury than any other Psychic 6. 15th born are tender, emotional, attractive and remain looking young forever. 15 men are drawn towards tantra, magic and witch craft for the gaining of power to enjoy pleasures of the body. 15 women turn to spiritualism and the occult to overcome their physical desires

 

16 This compound is out right unlucky, it is pictured by 'A Tower struck by lightening from which a man is seen falling with a Crown on his Head', it is also called 'The Shattered Citadel'. It gives warnings of some strange fatalities awaiting one, dangers of accidents and utter defeat in ones plans. If it appears as a compound number relating to the future, it is a warning sign that should be carefully noted and plans should be made in advance in an endeavour to avert its fatalistic tendencies.
16 is a karmic compound. It is composed of the Sun (1) and Venus (6). Venus is a benefic planet but is thought of as 'The Teacher of the Demons' the malefics; the sun, belongs to the Jupiter group, Jupiter is 'The Teacher of the Gods. This makes the Sun and Venus natural enemies. Those born on the 16th have to face many problems in life. 16=7; is the number of Ketu, who is malefic and veils the power of discrimination. The Sun gives idealism and venus makes them hedonistic. 16 Natives are idealistic on the outside but inside, they are pleasure seekers. Number 7 of Ketu makes them dis-interested in worldly gains and ambitions. They may have sad married lives but are blessed with good and successful children. Number 16 is calm on the outside but in turmoil inside. These people are slow moving, hot tempered, frequently ill or off mood, sensitive, emotional, nervous and easy going, easily upset and equally easily pleased. This number is modest, alert, clever, intellectual, good humoured, generous and strong. People are magnetically drawn to them but Natives of number 16 do not give their affections away easily and readily. They are courageous but must avoid depression.

17 A highly spiritual number, expressing in symbolism the '8 Pointed Star Of Venus'; a symbol of peace and love. It is also called 'The Star Of Magi' and expresses that the person it represents has risen superior in spirits to the trials and difficulties of his life and career. It is considered the 'Number of Immortality' and the persons name lives on even after his death. It is a very fortunate number if it works out in relation to future events, provided it is not associated with single numbers 4 and/or 8.

17 is composed of the Sun (1) and Ketu (7) creating the number of Saturn (8). It denotes a strong force leading to success in business on unusual lines and has an independent status. As the Sun and Ketu are enemies, 17 always has an inner conflict, but, this conflict gives rise to self search and makes the native more aware, loving and considerate towards others . Number 8 is ruled by the malefic Saturn, yet, 17 becomes benefic and serves the human race gaining name, fame and popularity. Saturn makes 17 successful in the later part of life through the generous hands of providence. These people become immortal through their names and acquire wealth, fame and prosperity though they do not have the fortune to enjoy a good family life. Natives with this compound at their back are lovers of peace, good organisers, deep thinkers, philanthropists and strongly attracted to the occult and spiritualism. They are proud and brave and strongly individualistic. Emotionally they are calm and sincere, they are generous to an uncalled for degree and on the flipside, stingy and miserly as miserly can be. They are born leaders.

 

18 This number is one of the most difficult to interpret. It is pictured as ' A rayed moon from which drops of blood are falling; a wolf and a hungry dog are seen below catching the falling drops of blood in their open and hungry mouths, while still lower, a crab is seen hastening to join them.' It is symbolic of materialism trying to destroy the spiritual side of nature. It generally associates a person with bitter quarrels, family feuds, wars, social upheavals, revolutions, underworld activities, terrorism and in some cases, indicates making money through wars and weapons of destruction. It warns of treachery, deception by others, dangers from natural elements such as storms, death by drowning, accidents, fires and explosions. When this compound number appears in anyone's calculations of names and future dates, uttermost caution should be exercised to avert its destructive effects and safeguard of family , self and loved ones is a must.

18 is composed of the Sun (1) and Saturn (8) creating the fiery Mars (9). The conjunction of the Sun and Saturn is one of the most inharmonious ones, one starts, the other ends. Compound 18 is psychic 9 and it faces intense inner conflict, oppositions, obstacles and strife in life. This number suffers family feuds, enmities, betrayal from friends, no peace, and happiness of fulfilment in personal life and does not enjoy the fruits of marriage nor the love and acknowledgement from kith and kin. This is also a very unethical number and it will employ any means to gain materially. These people should practise 'non violence'. Number 18 only becomes financially well off after the age of 40 years and merits rewards much later on in life.

19 This number is extremely fortunate and favourable. It is symbolised as the Sun and is called 'the Prince of heaven.' It promises happiness, success, esteem and honour. It makes the person it represents materially successful and helps execute all plans positively. This is one of my favourite compounds.

The compound is composed of two harmonious planets, the Sun (1) and Mars (9), which in turn gives the single number 1 of the Sun. The Sun is exalted at 19 degrees in the sign of Aries ruled by Mars in the positive aspect of number 9. The Sun makes 19 fortunate and wise; Mars makes them bold, dashing, aggressive and hot tempered. This number faces matrimonial discord. This number has all the qualities of the dynamic 1 and is more fortunate than those born on the 10th or 28th of any month. These Natives are super active, full of energy and on the go constantly. They have a natural talent and aptitude for research, sports, quick reflexes, decisions and implementation. They are unethical in love affairs and are quarrelsome with their partners, often loosing the one real thing that really matters. They are positive and expressive, though more through writing than speaking. This number is the symbol of the ever turning 'Wheel of Fortune'.

 

20 This is the number of 'awakening and judgement.' It is symbolised by 'a winged angel sounding a trumpet, while from below, a man, a woman and a child are seen rising from a tomb with their hands clasped in prayer.'

This number has a peculiar interpretation: The awakening of, or to, a new purpose, new plans, new ambitions; the call to action, action for some noble and great purpose, a call to duty or a cause. It is not a material number and consequently is a doubtful one as far as worldly success is concerned.

If used in relation to future events, it denotes delays, hindrances and obstacles to ones plans, which can only be conquered through the development of the spiritual side of ones nature and enlightenment.
The compound of 20 is composed of the Moon (2) with 0, number of eternity and endlessness. It has the magnified qualities of number 2, which is peace and happiness, relationship and harmony, but the 0 makes it impatient, vacillating, nervous, ever changing and dependent on others and loads 2 with tiring responsibilities. Number 20 is softer, more co-operative, tender, loving and more emotional than other Psychic 2's, but its rewards are denied by the world and this causes its natives to suffer anxieties, delays, depressions, despondency, unsuccessful married lives and makes them embrace spiritualism. This number can make a very successful writer. Natives of this number would prosper if they live near water.

21 This is a very lucky compound, it is pictured as the 'universe' and is also called 'The Crown of Magi.' It bestows advancement, honours, elevation in life and general success.

It means, victory after a long fight for the Crown of Magi is only gained after a long initiation and tests of determination and persistence. It is a fortunate number of great promises if it comes into future dates and events.

This compound is composed of the Moon (2) and the Sun (1), which gives the single number 3 of Jupiter. 21 differs from other psychic 3's, it differs from 12 as the 12 belongs to the series of 10 and 21 belongs to the series of 20's. Therefore 21 is more influenced by the Moon although it represents 3 and Jupiter. Two provides the gentleness and one provides the potentiality for success in life; number 2 is the arbitrator and diplomat whereas number 1 is the dynamic power of implementation. 21 is more social and friendly than any other number 3, it is very popular with the opposite sex and has a vast social circle. These natives are kind, loving, generous and diplomatic; they are destined to achieve name, fame and popularity though at a late age. They are suspicious and dominating, but, lucky and fortunate in all walks of life.

 

22 This number symbolises 'A good man blinded by the follies of others, with a knapsack on his back full of errors'. In the picture of the Tarot card, he appears to offer no self defence against a ferocious tiger attacking him. It is a warning number of illusion and delusion, of a good person lost in a fool's paradise; A Dreamer of dreams who only wakes when surrounded by danger. It is also a number of false judgements owing to the influence of others. If it appears as a number in dates and future events, it should be carefully noted.

22 is a Karmic compound, it is composed of Moon 2 and Moon 2, giving 4 which number belongs to Rahu. Psychic 4's born on the 22nd are most strongly influenced by the Moon, yet, they carry all the qualities of number 4 which makes them slow moving, obstinate, difficult and melancholic. These people often have to suffer separations from their family and loved ones. 22 men often marry more than once, they are more indulgent than most and are promiscuous. Apart from achieving marital bliss this number can achieve almost anything materially in the second half of life. This is the number of 'The Specialist' and 'The Mystic'; Practical, Systematic, Hard working, their peak years of attaining success is from 40 years to 60 years.

23 This number is called, 'The Royal Star of the Lion', it is a promise of success, help from superiors and protection from those in high positions. This in one of the most fortunate numbers if it comes out as a date, a name number or in future events.

23 is composed of the Moon (2) and Jupiter (3), creating the 5 which is the number of Mercury. It gives most unusual career graphs based on ones creative talents and opportunity. This number is not considerate about others and is bit too selfish. If they are to find happiness and keep it, which they usually do, they should be more tolerant, less selfish and more considerate of the feelings of others; they must remember that they are not the only ones with a heart. This is the number of success, money and Intelligence. Hard work well rewarded, favours, gifts, backing from those in position and power, and benefits from the opposite sex are almost assured. This number is moody, sentimental, loves to dare and take risks, loved by all, given to a life of luxury with name, fame and popularity. They enjoy greater prosperity if they reside near the waters. They often inherit vast wealth and are very lucky people. They are highly emotional and vacillate in their emotions and decisions. They love family life and cannot live without love, yet, they resent loosing their freedom. They are very expressive vocally and have sweet voices as well as can become renowned artists, singers and orators. This is the real number of 'Quick Silver'.

 

24 This is a very fortunate number as well, it promises the help and association of those of high rank and position. It denotes success in one's plans, gains through love and the opposite sex and is a favourable number when it comes out in relation to future events, dates and name numbers.

The compound of 24 is composed of the Moon (2) and Rahu (4), also the number of Uranus and from ancient times, the double number of the Sun. It produces number 6 which is the number of Venus. The Moon and Rahu are opposites and opposed, but a Psychic 6 from a 24 becomes very lucky as opposites attract and hence 2 and 4 are in harmony. There is a difference between those born on the 24th and the 15th, 24 undergoes multiple changes, the Moon makes them helping, sincers and yet vascillating and Rahu makes them obstinate, persistant and strong.These Natives are the strong, silent, secretive kind who benefit from the opposite sex but have to pay a price as they suffer betrayals and often get stabbed in the back Only is their Destiny and Name number is in harmony with their Psychic number 6, can 24 enjoy a reasonable but ordinary family life. They are never happy with their wedded mates and always need to look elsewhere for their physical and emotional needs. This number restricts personal freedom as its Native is caught up in commitments to the family, social bindings and face keeping. Their family members become their Jailors. These people are either born rich, inherit through marriage or wealth lands in their lap

 

25 This number denotes strength gained through experience and benefits obtained through observations of people and things. This number learns from other's mistakes. It has to work hard to achieve success and may have to face strife, struggle and trials in the earlier part of life. In later life, its Natives become most lucky. It's a favourable number when it appears as dates, name number and in relation to future events.

The compound is composed or the Moon (2) and Mercury (5), together they produce the single number 7 that is the number of the half planet Ketu, also considered the number of Neptune and the double number of the Moon .This is not one of the best combinations though it is not unfortunate. The Moon is neutral to Mercury but Mercury does'nt view the Moon with friendly eyes. Psychic 7 from compound 25 tend to have a hard childhood but they are lucky for all around them. 2 and 5 are both changeable and vascillate often, they have a fluctuating character, this shadowed by the planet of ambiguity, Ketu, gives them some hard times. Those born on the 25th are more Mody, Snsitive, Iaginative, Atistic and Plosophical than any other Psychic 7. Number 7 is very lucky in love, being a 27 the Native also gains financially especially through marriage. This number has a Photostat memory and is highly Spiritual. They stand the risk of becoming 'Jacks of all Trades and Masters of non', they love to travel and are afflicted with the wanderlust. Foreign lands hold the ultimate interest for them. Natives of this number are sincere, loyal, family minded and honest.

26 This number is full of the gravest warnings for the future. It foreshadows disasters brought about by the association of others, ruin through bad speculations, wrong partnerships, unions and unworthy advice. One should consider carefully treading the path if this number comes out in future dates and names of associates.
The compound is composed of the Moon 2 and Venus 6, they are at loggerheads, making this an unfortunate compound which adds to 8 the number of the fatalistic planet saturn. This is a detrimental compound and looses out on account of its unbalanced emotions, over(self)indulgence, wrong judgments, neglect, betrayals from partners and business associates . This compound becomes materialistic and fatalistic and faces multiple delays and oppositions in the first half of life. Number 26 is not a promiscuous number and should make a wise choice in the selection of a life partner, the most suited for this number is Psychic 1, 3, 6 or 8 . 26 men are cruel, vengeful and capable of being the worst enemy that one would have the misfortune to come across. These Natives tend to be lethargic, sluggish, fickle minded, revelers in wine and women and careless regarding their children. They are materialistic and get easy money as they are lucky in money matters. They do not have enough of a positive attitude and often have problematic love affairs. For this number, 'Big is beautiful'.

 

27 This is a fortunate number and is symbolised by 'The Sceptre'. It is a promise of authority, power and command. It indicates that handsome rewards will come from the productive intellect; that the creative faculties have sown good seeds and will reap a bountiful harvest. People who have 27 as their Psychic number should always carry out their own plans and ideas and not get taken in by others suggestions. It is a fortunate number in every sense; it's deemed a KARMIC number.

This compound is composed of the Moon (2) and Ketu (7), which gives us the single number 9 of Mars. Two is co-operative and 7 has intellectual pursuits; in conjunction, they make the highest achievements in the creative and philanthropic fields and give a promise of wealth, recognition and wide travels. The Moon and Rahu are opposites, both depend on other numbers for their completion and welfare, being opposites, they attract each other. The effect of Mars makes 27 extremely authoritative, powerful, commanding, devoted to their families and loving towards all. 27 is given its dash by the fiery Mars and is a 'Specialist' of sorts. This number can quite easily become a spiritualist and attain healing powers. They have a strong sex-drive and get into illicit relationships with the opposite sex, often landing in the eye of the storm and creating wild scandals. Their married lives are not very successful and they often find themselves estranged with their partners. This number apart from being scientific is a 'showman'.

28 This number is full of contradictions. It indicates a person of great promise and possibilities who is likely to see it all taken away from him unless he carefully provides for the future. It indicates losses through trust in others, opposition and competition in business, danger of loss through court cases and the law. This number has the unfortunate likelihood of having to begin on the path of life over and over again from scratch. It is not a fortunate number from any aspect.

Composed of the Moon (2) and Saturn (8) – eternal enemies – with the manifest qualities of number 1, which is the number of the Sun, 28 becomes a difficult compound . It has to face many many obstacles, oppositions, struggle and strife. Due to the influence of the Sun on this compound, it gets the grace of success but only after a long and trying struggle. 28th born are less commanding, demanding, authoratative and dynamic than other Psychic 1's. Numbers 2 and 8 are both servants, tough fighters and serious minded. This makes 28 good fighters. Two gives the tolerance and philosophy, and 8 denotes material progress and intelligence in modernisation, hence 28 is a combination of spiritualism and materialism. Number 28 is not as lucky as 1, 10 and 19, and has to face many public and private embarrassments and complications.

 

29 This is a tricky number. It indicates uncertainties, treachery and deception from others. It foreshadows trials, tribulations, obstacles, delays and unexpected dangers. It brings unreliable friends, grief, betrayal and treachery from the opposite sex. It gives grave warnings if it comes out relating to any future events and dates. This compound is of the Moon (2) and Mars (9) governed by the Moon and number 2. It is a compound of uncertainties and insecurities, more influenced by the Moon than by Mars, hence the wavering attributes. 29 can become materially successful but in their personal or married lives, they fail badly.

These Natives are dominated life long by the dual nature of 2 and the sentimentality of 9. If blessed with a harmonic Destiny and Name number, 29 may be able to play its cards right, else, the influence of Mars makes them doubting, restless, rash and aggressive. Men with the compound of 29 at their back have a tremendous weakness for women, and these women are the cause of their downfall and misery. If a 29 does not marry early in life, it is doubtful whether its Native will ever settle down with a compatible partner and enjoy marital harmony and bliss. This is the number of the 'Extremist'.

30 This is a number of thoughtful deduction, retrospection and mental superiority over one's fellow beings. It seems to belong completely to the mental plane. The person it represents is likely to put all material things aside, not because he has to but because he wishes to do so. Number 30 can just about donate all its wealth and become a hermit. For this reason, it is neither fortunate nor unfortunate, as it all depends solely upon the mental outlook of the person it represents. It can be all powerful at the same time totally passive and indifferent depending on the free will of the person it represents.

This compound is Jupiter (3) and the symbol of eternity (0) and it's governed by Jupiter itself. Due to the presence of the 0, number 30 becomes the least fortunate of all the Psychic 3's.The 0 slows down its progress and tends to make friends turn away for no valid reason. The Natives with number 30 at their back, often suffer seperations from their loved ones as well as have broken marriages and relationships.Those born on the 3rd or the 30th use more mind than practicality, they are basically good thinkers but they deplete their mental energies. 30 has to struggle a lot in the first half of life and they progress slowly. 3 is a very lucky number and it is deemed 'The Trinity' , it's a social, friendly, generous and hard working number, hence, it will always be materially comfortable. Number 30 has a peculiar trait though, it does not believe in the religion that it is born into, instead, it befriends other religions and or creates its own fundamental philosophies and beliefs on a New Religion. This number often makes a jest of religion yet it professes love and brotherhood.

31 This number is very similar to the number 30, except that it is even more self-contained, lonely and isolated from other human beings. This is the number of the 'Recluse' and not a fortunate one from the worldly point of view. Jupiter 3 and the Sun 1 get together to create the third ruling entity, number 4 under the authority of Rahu. This is a difficult number and would need tremendous effort to make anything of its life. Rahu, number 4 is Malefic and known for its secretive moves, sudden and unexpected upsets and changes(good or bad), delays and uncertainities in the life of its Native.

31st born are not considered as fortunate as other number 3's, they are insecure, misunderstood, lonely, less popular, suffer isolation, misunderstood. They often join the opposition or revolutionary groups where they can make themselves heard and their presence felt even if they have to employ violent methods to impose their views on others. Jupiter gives them the love for justice, but they themselves may not always use just means to get it for themselves. They profess fairness, but for their own gains can easily do away with it.This number has to struggle for recognition. 31 has ambition, pride, austerity. The native is of charitable nature, loves the underdog and looks after the suffering and handicapped. This number starts its success story only after the 40th year of life.

 

33 This number has no potency of its own and has the same qualities and meanings as number 24, which is also a 6.

34 Has the same meaning as 25 which equals to a 7 as well.

35 Has the same meaning as 26, which equals to a 8 as well.

36 Has the same meaning as 27, which equals to a 9 as well.

37 Happy, fortunate relationships

38 Has the same meaning as 20, which equals to a 2 as well.

39 Has the same meaning as 30, which equals to a 3 as well.

40 Has the same meaning as 31 which equals to a 4 as well.

41 Has the same meaning as 32 which equals to a 5 as well.

42 Has the same potency and meaning as 24 which equals to a 6 as well.

43 This is a very unfortunate number, it is one of revolutions, upheavals, strife, failure, prevention, destruction and delays. It is unfortunate if it comes out in any calculations of the total of a name number.

44 Has the same meaning as 26.

45 Has the same meaning as 27.

46 Has the same meaning as 37.

47 Has the same meaning as 29.

48 Has the same meaning as 30.

49 Has the same meaning as 31.

50 Has the same meaning s 32.

51 Powerfully potent

52 Has the same meaning as 43.

37 This number has a distinct potency of its own.

It denotes happy, healthy and fortunate relationships in love and friendship and in combinations connected with the opposite sex. It is good for all kinds of partnerships and indicates good fortune if it comes out in calculations of future events and name numbers.

43 This is a very unfortunate number, it is one of revolutions, upheavals, strife, failure, prevention, destruction and delays.
It is unfortunate if it comes out in any calculations of the total of a name number.

51 This number is a very powerfully potent one and has a strange interpretation. It represents the nature of a Warrior; it promises sudden and certain advancement in whatever one undertakes.

It is especially favourable for Army and Navy people as well as for Leaders in any field and for a cause. At the same time it threatens of enemies, dangers and the likelihood of an assassination.