Dear Love
Guru,
My husband
is very stingy. He refuses to take me to dinners or buy me anything. He gives
money to run the house but refuses to splurge on anything else. How do I make
him a little generous?
Sincerely,
Pallavi
Dear Pallavi,
Money
matters are always sensitive in any relationship. Approach this carefully. Ask
him about the EMIs he has or investments he has made for the future. Maybe a
large chunk of his money goes into savings. Figure out if there is a way you
can cut down on the household expenditure in any way. If you save from your end
a little bit, you will have enough to splurge on yourself or the family later.
Have a frank discussion with him about what his dreams are and what are the
short-term goals you both have. If he wants to save for the next twenty years,
let him know the things you need on a regular basis to last the twenty years
with him. Don’t be too demanding. If you need a vacation, make it a small,
budget friendly one. If you want to buy clothes, make sure they’re not
designer. If you want to eat out, you can still have romantic dinner with your
husband and friends at reasonable places. Also don’t let your peer group
pressurize you to live large. Start working and contributing as well. Even if
you get a small income, you can spend it on the things you desire instead of
continuously asking him. Remember, materialistic things fade with time. A
strong relationship remains forever!
3 comments:
In my region and community men don't give money to their wives. They will provide with food and clothes but no cash in hand as they think it will make women dominate over men. Mothers don't have even Rs. 10 to ask someone to buy them a Pepsi to cool themselves (thats why they are not used to be cool moms like in big cities). Mojority of women in the country have this situation beside women in big cities.
This is an unthinkable situation for me, unacceptable. I do not care at what region or country or Planet, or... This is incredible and terribly at the same time.
If you need funds - please go to work. I can not accept a subordinate position of women in society. Family - I think about it in partnerships category. If someone needs to be The Lord of or The Slave. Hmm, "Role playing" is a chic variant.
The reasons of miserliness can be absolutely different. If it's a part of personality then it's one thing. And btw it can be a family's baggage.
And in the end for me
an independence is main rule, and financial independence especially.
(An Emotional Independence is hardest thing in relationships :) )
Thanks so much.
Keep reading and recommending my blog to your friends.
Also check out www.madhuribanerjee.in
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