Thursday, December 18, 2014

Peshawar Killing. Global Shock.

We have lost 144 children today. 7 Terrorists stormed an Army Public School in Peshawar on 16th December 2014 and shot children. Children. Children who wanted to grow up and make the world a better place, to dream, to earn, to fly, to laugh, to live. There is no justification for this act of gruesome murder. There is no humanity left.

16th December seems to be a black day in history. 2 years ago it was the Nirbhaya case that made the world sit up and take notice and now it’s shootings of 144 children in a school in Peshawar.

Needless to say every Whatsapp group is now sharing rage rather than jokes. The papers are showing images of people and children all around the world praying for peace. We are all numbed by this horrific act of the Taliban.

No! Life cannot go on until the world unites in stopping these heinous crimes. Unless the world says these are our children, not yours, but ours, nobody can move. Till the world says I feel your pain. Help us, help you. let us not look away. It is not their pain. It is not their loss. It is not another country that India has a love–hate relationship with. It is children of the world. Innocent, beautiful, high hopes and dreams children who wondered what they did wrong as they were shot in the head!

We need to connect to each other beyond boundaries, beyond religion, beyond economic stratas. It’s time to take ownership of this heinous crime. 
The world should not move on to Christmas till the governments make a plan and only we can put force on them to do. Write about it. Tweet about it.

I hear voices that say nothing will change. Osama Bin laden was killed but nothing changed. Things will change when nations stand together. When every media agency puts pressure on the governments concerned to root out the snakes in their back yard, things will change. To not categorize good and bad within Taliban and bring each one to justice, things will change. Every human being is supposed to have some good in them but the 7 terrorists who killed the innocent children as they cried and begged and pleaded for mercy and saw their friends shot point blank in the head and their teacher burned alive, those terrorists have no good in them. There is no justification.

There is no pain greater than losing a child. There are widows and orphans. But there is no word for the loss of a child.

Peshawar we are with you. We will stay with you.


Sunday, November 16, 2014

Scandalous Housewives Review: Strong, Unflinching Women.

"What is commendable is that the author's portrayal of women isn't stereotypical. Though all the protagonists are housewives, neither of them has been portrayed as gharelu, sushil, sundar type nor the other extreme - promiscuous...the pace keeps you hooked." Sneha Madhavan. Absolute India newspaper.

Buy Scandalous Housewives here: http://goo.gl/6AQ4DC

Saturday, November 15, 2014

The Art of a Good Kiss


My first boyfriend didn’t know how to kiss. He would just open his mouth and slobber all over my lips. It was awful. No matter how nice and wonderful he was, I had to dump him because he never got the fact that kissing was the most sensuous thing for a woman.
Kissing keeps your relationship alive. Kissing is the first step to foreplay. Kissing is an art that require less saliva and more intention. Kissing is always followed by wise words! Here are the different types.  
1.     Getting to know you kiss – The first or second date kiss. After a lovely conversation you are dropping the girl home. You know a little about her and think she’s really hot. You don’t want to over step. So you walk her in front of her place and face her. Lean in slightly, close your eyes, open your mouth by only half an inch like a fish and kiss her softly. Don’t use your tongue and don’t suck around anything! If she likes it, she’ll ask you do it again. Repeat. Don’t try to grope, etc because she’s liked this! Say “Good night.”

2.     Stop the Car Kiss – You don’t know where your relationship is going. You’ve had a mad fight. You’re upset and she’s hurting. That’s when you need to take action. You need to salvage the situation. You stop the car, un--belt yourself and lean over, pull her head slightly towards you gently and kiss her with your mouth ( 1 inch open.) No tongue. No licking. No slobbering. Just a deep kiss like you’re taking in a gulp of fresh air, fresh love. Say “I love you.”

3.     Do you want to have sex kiss – You’re both alone in a room. You want to start a process. Stand facing each other or you can sit holding each other. Start by kissing her mouth slowly without using your tongue. Use your lips to kiss her lips, her cheeks, behind her ears, her neck. Go slow. Count to three before planting a kiss and doing another one. As if you’re drawing her out of her shell. Don’t be in a hurry. Come back to her mouth. Now begin to kiss a little more passionately. Slowly with each kiss open your mouth a little more till you can slip your tongue in. Now you’ve mastered the “French Kiss.” Don’t probe around like a spy. Don’t produce too much saliva. Drink in her sweetness. She’ll soon say yes. Say “I need you.”

4.     Long Time No See Kiss – Sometimes things need to become a little more aggressive and intense. You haven’t seen your spouse/ mate for a long time. The pent up feelings have been burning inside you. You need to show her how much you missed her. There is no time for the gentleness of it all. As soon as you are in a private place, hold her head with both your hands and draw her into you for a kiss. As soon as her head is close to you, wrap your arms around her waist and hold her closer. Kiss her with closed mouth at first going towards her neck and ears and quickly come back to her lips. Open your mouth and kiss as if you’re taking air from after drowning. After about five six kisses, use your tongue. Don’t start with your tongue. You’ll be surprised at how it puts women off even if they were in the mood for a while! (Yes women are strange creatures!) Close your eyes and kiss her. Then open and look at her, panting, making sure she is reading your signals and before she can start speaking again, (of course they will!) start the process of kissing her again repeating your steps of lips, cheeks, ear, neck on the other side. Use your tongue more now. Say “I missed you.”

5.     Thank You Kiss – You’ve had great sex, she’s got you a lovely present, you’ve had a nice dinner, whatever the occasion, you must thank her with a kiss. This kiss is soft and gentle, firm and affirmative. Like I know what you’ve given me and I really appreciate it. Put your thumb and forefinger together. That’s the amount you should open your mouth for this type of kiss. Don’t use tongue again, unless she gives you a look that says she would like to be thanked in a “better” manner. Then use step 3 or step 4 for it. Say “Thank you.”

6.     Let’s Be Friends Kiss – So a woman might be into you but you don’t really want to go down that road. A peck on the cheek, a peck on the forehead and a peck on the back of her hand means you still want to remain friends but you don’t think of her in “that way.” A peck means “Not now.” A quick peck can be given to your mate at any time on the cheek, hand or lips to say you’re grateful for them in your life. Say “You’re wonderful.”

7.     The Professional Hickey Kiss – Once you’ve mastered the art of how to use your mouth, your tongue and your lips, you can move on to biting. This is the slightly rough SnM type of kiss. When you can bit the corners of her mouth so that it pinches just a bit just for a moment. It’s pulling with your lips and a bit of your teeth her lips. During sex, this can cause a hickey. Use your mouth to cover a part of her skin on her body, the neck, or shoulders and hold your mouth and teeth over it for as long as you can and suck in. Only do this when she’s about to have an orgasm or she’ll be turned off. Say “God I want you!”

Always understand the mood of each kiss. When in doubt, begin with the first step. Never push it too much if she’s not comfortable. Have fun!
 

Thursday, November 13, 2014

Relationships and Physics

Me. What do you think about relationships?
Male friend - Its like physics.  Free protons r energy particles flying arr. No neg or positive charge. Sometimes they join a neg atom and make it a positive atom. Now the protons change a lot to be a part of the atom and give up freedom of flying arr and choose to circle an orbit in an atom. And the only change the atom goes through is that its charge changes from neg to positive. Like men.

So. Basic laws of physics.

Me. Aahh.

Monday, October 20, 2014

The Kung Fu of Foreplay


Foreplay seems like a land Far Far way, where no man has ever gone. And no man has ever understood.
Foreplay is that word, that phenomenon, that enigma that eludes the comprehension of every male in the world. Yes, there are a few who will say they can last “45 minutes.” Or even declare, “They can give the best orgasm to the woman.” But do not kid yourself when you say you are good at foreplay. No matter how many educational degrees you have acquired, or diploma courses you’ve taken in your life, foreplay is the one course that you’ve never been interested in. Foreplay is the degree, the idea, the intent that you need to master to keep your woman, any woman at your mercy always.
Now before you understand what foreplay is you must change three things about yourself.
1.      Patience – You will need patience to master this phenomenon.
2.      Softness – You will need delicate fingertips and be gentle when you have foreplay.
3.      Timing – If you move to an erogenous zone too fast, you’ve lost your woman. She will be thinking of her chores and immediately say she has a headache.
Men don’t need foreplay too much. They love a blow job. Need a little ear tickle. And presence of a woman. Not necessarily in that order. But women always need foreplay. Otherwise they’ll agree to have sex with you once or twice, but you can rest assure that it will not be fantastic, she may lie there like a corpse and/or if she is married she will figure out how to have an affair.
So the key of giving great foreplay is to go slowly. So remember to spend at least 4-5 minutes on each zone.  
The 9 Erogenous Zones to Great Foreplay:
1.      Mouth – You must be able to kiss her without your hands roaming all over her body. Hold her close. Stroke her hair. Kiss her lips, corners of her mouth, gently use your tongue to arouse her further. Do not use your tongue vigorously. You don’t always need to prove you’re passionate. Prove you are gentle and she’ll respect you more.

2.      Neck - Nibble at her ears, behind her neck, down the length of her neck and shoulders. Slowly blow air as you kiss and blow simultaneously across her neck and shoulders, crossing to the other side and repeating the action. Each side taking a few minutes.

3.      Arms – With the tips of your fingers you can stroke your woman’s. Remember counting is important here. While you run your three or four fingers alternatively down her arm, it should take you about ten – fifteen seconds per each length. Place them gently on her arm from shoulder to finger tips as if you’re a slow energy that is drumming against her and pulling away at her fingers.

4.      Back - Once she feels comfortable to remove her clothes, swivel her around slowly and use the tips of your fingers to make patterns on her back. Not your entire palm. Just your fingers. Raise your fingers and place them gently back again, giving her a bit of suspense where she will be touched next. Pretend to make waves with your fingertips across her back. Remember to finish one pattern of a wave down her back before you begin making concentric circles, or making waves her along the length of her sides timidly near her breasts.

5.      Knee – Here is a secret. Under the knee is one of the most erogenous zones of a woman and rarely explored. Put your fingers together, not in a fist, as if you’re making a flower bud, hold it under her knee and release the fingertips as if the flower is opening. Do this very gently for ten seconds till the entire fingertips open. Do this a few times even on one knee. You don’t need to do it on both sides. One knee is enough for arousal.

6.      Toes – Many women love getting their toes sucked. Gently run your fingers across her pedicured feet and take her one toe in your mouth at a time. You don’t need to spend too much time here.

7.      Breasts – Gently running your fingertips across both her breasts will arouse her more than you tugging at them. Flick her nipples with your tongue. Rub your tongue around the areola. Kiss her breasts. Sometimes you don’t need to suck or tug. Also you don’t need to head to the other side and do the same with the other breast unless she asks you. The purpose is to arouse her, not to find balance in life.

8.      Clitoris – Most men hate going down on women. But you can always use your fingers. Once she is aroused from all the other zones, put two fingers in and keep your thumb out. Gently move the two fingers in and out and move the thumb in circles around, outside the vagina. If you can kiss her, lick her, probe your tongue into her alternatively while using your fingers, you’ve pretty much mastered foreplay.

9.      Brain – Do not indulge in dirty talk while you are trying to arouse your woman. You can do that later during intercourse. Or you can do it on the phone when you can’t feel each other. But while you are being gentle, slow and sensitive, you must indulge in silence or simple questions like “Do you like this. Do you want more? Where do you want me to touch you?” Let her lie back and enjoy herself. Keep conversation about her.
Warning – Do not mention anything related to house, children, finances, in laws, body weight, your work, bosses, maids, etc. A woman’s mood is as delicate as china ware. No matter how much of the above zones you have aroused, one mention of the above topics will shatter her want and see her getting dressed and putting on her favourite TV show.
Having foreplay may be a slightly longer process to getting sex but it’s a sure shot process and it will leave the woman desiring you forever!
Published in Maxim magazine October issue:

 

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

India Today Woman

This is the second time I've been featured in the India Today Woman magazine.
Feel completely honoured and humbled by this experience.
It just goes to show that the Universe is looking out for you so just do your work and things will happen.
Scandalous Housewives Mumbai is a super success. I feel that after the end of this series I'll stop writing books for some time. Will take a break to try something new.
It's the October issue for all those who want to read the article. 
And my book is available at Flipkart Amazon Infibeam. You can pick the story you want to read! 

Saturday, October 11, 2014

Are Relationships Necessary?

Was pondering this a few nights ago. Got the answer back from a friend today. Thought I shd blog abt it. What do you think?

Q. Are relationships meant to stagnate? Or die out? Or do ppl carry on bcos they believe in that love and find new shades? Do the relationships even matter in the long run?

A.In my opinion- almost all  relationships tend to follow a pre-determined course because of the common denomination of human behaviour. Comfort and subsequent stagnation and lethargy are therefore common consequences in a romantic one. Relationships matter till you are determined to play an active part in society- so their failure or success affect one's idea of well being. As to the importance of a single relationship, that's entirely dependent on the people involved. No relationship is indispensable. How important a role it plays in yur personal happiness quotient is what determines when its time to let go.

Sunday, September 21, 2014

Scandalous Housewives Book Review

By The Dehradun Post
by NEHA SAINI on SEPTEMBER 21, 2014

More than raunchy tale of Lust, Kinky Sex!

Madhuri Banerjee is back with another racy read on love and relationships titled ‘Scandalous Housewives: Mumbai’. The book revolves around the lives of four housewives living in a residential high rise of Mumbai. As the parallel stories of these four women progress forward, the reader is compelled to ponder upon the role a housewife (read homemaker) plays in a family.

The book promises a raunchy tale of lust, lies, betrayal and of course a final show down but I would urge you not to judge the book by its cover. At many points the novel surprises the reader by the immense depth of its female characters and their paradigm shifting portrayal. Amidst the kinky sex episodes and saucy secrets, the author portrays the ‘lovely ladies’ in bold colours of liberty, breaking all forms of restraint; pushing all boundaries and stepping over all thresholds.

The plot of the story, though thin through the initial half, gathers pace as the story progresses. The lives of the four friends entangle in a meshwork of explosive lies and as all of them strive to maintain the peace of their households, a threatening email shatters everything to the floor; and this marks the real and ultimate test of their ties of friendship. However will they survive?

I must mention here that the plot is a little unfathomable and shaky at certain points, being a major turn off. This line marks my favourite point in the novel – “The best thing a father can give to a child is respect to the mother.”

If you’re looking for a masala weekend read, I’d say go for ‘Scandalous Housewives: Mumbai’ and you may end up with a little more than you bargained for.

I have purposefully not given it any ratings since I wrote the review keeping in mind that the reader would pick it up just as a weekend read. I haven’t judged it with the same standards as I would an Ayn Rand book. I hope that’s okay.

Available on Flipkart Amazon.in and Infibeam

Friday, September 12, 2014

A Maxim-umm Moment

There are three milestones that would make an author complete.
1. When you win an international prize (Man Booker/ Pulitzer)   
2. When your book sells really well. (1 Million plus copies)
3. When you get a column to write. (Maxim!)
When Maxim magazine asked me to be their Sex and Relationship columnist, I knew I had achieved at least one out of the three things I wanted from my career.
 

But when they called me and told me they wanted to launch my book and me as a columnist in a grand event, I was overwhelmed.
See, I have a confession to make; I am terribly afraid of public speaking. I feel anxious and nervous. I don’t sleep for several nights. I wonder incessantly what I will say, how I will look, and what I will do.
When I finally went on stage my heart was fluttering and I had butterflies in my stomach.
The Emcee asked me, “What inspired you to write Scandalous Housewives? Are any of these stories true?”
And in that moment I lost all my inhibition. If I wasn’t going to be just me, what was the point?
I took a deep breath and replied with a straight face. “Yes. They’re all autobiographical!” Then I smiled finally. And the audience laughed. That made the rest of the questions, the reading and the evening pass beautifully.
When I spoke to Richa Chaddha the actress from Gangs of Wasseypur she told me, “I can’t believe you were so bold and funny. You inspired me!”

My Sex column is in the latest issue of Maxim magazine. My book Scandalous Housewives is on Flipkart and Amazon right now.

Two days later, I gave a talk in Indore on stage for one hour on “Love, Life & Chances”. And I have decided to give more talks in public about every topic I feel from my heart. I’ve realised apart from books, columns, awards and the limelight, I need to be me and talk about what I believe. And that should be the 4th goal of every writer’s life.
Inspiration comes from everywhere. It’s all around us. And we need to give back to truly be successful. So thank you Maxim for giving me that step to do more with my life.   

Watch it on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=scandalous+housewives 

Storizen September Issue:
https://issuu.com/storizen/docs/sept2014/7?e=0

Flipkart link to Scandalous Housewives: http://goo.gl/3J2MIr

Amazon Link : http://goo.gl/4Y1edx

Saturday, August 30, 2014

Scandalous Housewives Launch with Maxim

Maxim magazine launches my new book Scandalous Housewives Mumbai. And introduces me as their new sex Columnist.
With Richa Chadha at the Maxim event it was a night to remember forever.
I would get Richa to play the character Arti from the novel.
Now off to write it as a screenplay!
Get the book here to read about all the sex scandal and betrayals! 

Scandalous Housewives Flipkart link: http://goo.gl/1HDwbs.

Thursday, August 14, 2014

Scandalous Housewives: The first reaction

The box comes. I know what it is. I scream in happiness. The months of preparation. A whole year of living with the idea. Endless worry. Prayers for it being right. Weeks of being anti social. I rip open the box and hold my fifth baby in my hands. Scandalous Housewives.

I know the fight it has taken to come out. But how will it do now?

It can only be a success if everyone buys a copy. It takes time and effort to make the book. A compromise on your social and family life because you believe in a career. You believe that this is the only thing that you want to do for the rest of your life. You believe that good writing will triumph great marketing. You believe that friends will spread the word. You believe that the power of a story will put food on your table. You believe the days of loneliness will be worth it. And you release your book into the world hoping that your dream won't die and your year won't be a waste. And that someone will order it. How stupid writers are na?

Order #ScandalousHousewives here if you like my work and believe in reading a great story: http://goo.gl/1HDwbs

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Scandalous Housewives: Mumbai

 What happens when what lies between the sheets becomes the linen that is washed in public?

 
Sapphire Towers: just another residential high-rise in Mumbai where the humdrum routine of daily life carries on with clockwork precision. But, beneath the tranquil surface lurks a web of deceit and lies spun by a group of lonely housewives.

Gita, frustrated mother of two young daughters, longs to escape the monotony of marriage—and spice up her sex life in the most wicked fashion. Sarita, conservative Gujarati housewife and mother, is addicted to kinky sex and pays a dear price for it. Stylish working mother, Aarti, nurses an appalling secret that could end her marriage. And sultry ex-model Natasha, who seems to have it all, is hopelessly in love with a much younger man—the son of one of her friends.

Even as these women scramble to conceal their darkest secrets, an anonymous email is sent out to all the residents of Sapphire Towers, and has horrific consequences.

Racy and unputdownable, Scandalous Housewives: Mumbai is the first book in the sizzling new series by bestselling author Madhuri Banerjee, which  tell the stories of the unsung housewives of urban India who will go to any lengths to fulfil their deepest, darkest desires.
 
Releasing this August!
 

Saturday, June 14, 2014

How to Manage a One Night Stand



Sex in summer is hot. Literally! But who has the time to get into a new relationship? You need something quick and casual. A one night stand!
A one night stand is a spontaneous sexual encounter with a person without any strings attached. And with a hope that you won’t ever see them again. It’s about lust. A raw desire. A surrender to your primal instinct. A deep need for passion. But not everyone can get it right. Here’s how you can master the art.  

15 Rules to a One Night Stand:

1.     Clean Up – Just because it’s hot, doesn’t mean you can’t be well groomed. Trim that beard, take a shower, brush your teeth, splash on some cologne and wear a clean, crisp shirt when you head out. The better you look the more chances you have to finding a girl.

2.     Tidy Up – You will be bringing a woman home if you’re lucky. She doesn’t want to lie on top of a bed full of clothes, a sofa full of newspaper, a wet bathroom with used towels on the floor or any other mess you have in the apartment. Organise your space so that it doesn’t look as if a tornado hit it. Nothing turns a woman off more than an unkempt area. Leave a lamp on before you leave so you don’t have to turn on bright tube lights when you both enter. Set the mood before you go.

3.     Stock Up – Keep a condom ready. Doesn’t matter if it’s in the heat of the moment. You need to keep one with you at all times and a few spare in your house. Check the expiry date. Use it. You don’t want your one night stand to become standing all night with a baby.

4.     Smile Up – You’re in a bar and you see a pretty girl. She’s hanging out with others. Make eye contact and smile a lot. Understand a woman’s body language. If she’s not in to you, find someone else. Don’t just pursue one person. Don’t be eerie and stare at her. Look away and be engrossed with your own friends or talk to others around you. Let her be intrigued. Smile at her if she comes to you.

5.     Dance Up – Let the music move your body. If you can’t dance well, groove to the music near the bar and let yourself be free. Don’t go up to a girl and start grinding with her. You can ask a girl to show you some moves and when the song is over, thank her and go back to your drink. Unless she’s in to you and wants to dance some more, don’t push your luck.

6.     Speak Up – If the woman is still sitting in a corner, send her a note saying how you would like to buy her a drink, or how her eyes are truly beautiful and inviting. Go over to her table and speak to her friend about how you find the girl next to her (the one you were eyeing) truly mesmerizing but you can’t look her in the eye and say that since you’re shy, so she should pass on the message. Cheesy? Yes. Affective? Most definitely!

7.     Loosen Up – You don’t have to have alcohol to have a good time. Just have fun in a place grooving to the music and enjoying the ambience. If you do have alcohol, know your limits. You don’t want to come across as a leech or a stalker. Your final aim is not to get into the Limca book of records for holding your alcohol. 2 drinks should suffice for a good time.

8.     Laugh Up – When you go out with friends, you have a great time no matter whom you end up with that night. Remember a few jokes before you go out. Laughter always eases the situation wherever you are. When you can make a girl laugh, you’ve won her over. If she doesn’t want to come home with you, respect that. You’re not going to hit a home run every night that you’re out. So have a good time with who you meet and don’t let sex become the priority.

9.     Belt Up – Call a driver if you have your own car. Leave your bike behind and call for a cab if you’ve had a few drinks. Never drink and drive and put yourself or your date in jeopardy. You don’t want to end up in jail or worse the hospital because you couldn’t think straight.

10.  Offer Up – You’ve brought the woman home. Show her the bathroom. Offer her a glass of wine or another drink to put her in the mood. Do not offer any food. It will sober her up and she’ll soon realize that she made a mistake. It will also waste time.

11.  Kink Up – It’s a one night stand for God’s sake so you don’t have to be formal and ask her about her family and her ambitions. Bring out the silk scarves, handcuffs and whipped cream if you want to. Always take a woman’s permission to try anything. If it’s just plain passionate sex you’re both seeking, you don’t need to put romantic music to get in the mood. She’s come home with you. She’s already in the mood.

12.  Shut Up – You don’t need to use euphemisms about it being a one night stand. “I’m a rolling stone that gathers no moss.” “We’re like strangers in the night, passing each other.” Honestly the woman already knows. She doesn’t want to hear that before or after coitus. Neither does she want to hear. “I did it!” “Was it good for you?” “So how much do I owe you?” Let the conversation be about how beautiful she is and that you had a great time.

13.  Hang On – It’s okay to spend the night if you’ve gone to her place. And do let her sleep it off as much as she likes if she’s staying the night at yours. She’s just given you sex. At least be respectful about her time. If you have a maid or relative coming in the morning, call that person up and defer the time for them to enter. If you’re at a woman’s place, don’t leave immediately after sex, even if you’re sober. Spend a few more hours until dawn, even if you’re awake lying in bed or having a cup of coffee before you leave.

14.  Send Off – If the woman has come to your place, offer a cup of coffee but you don’t need to hang around to give her breakfast. Say you had a great time and it would be nice if you bump into her again sometime. Don’t exchange phone numbers so there’s no expectation for anyone to call. If you’re at her place, kiss her gently on the cheek and thank her for a lovely time and leave. You don’t need to spend the day with her cleaning up and getting to know her better.

15.  Sober Up – Take a few days off before you try the ritual again. You don’t want to jump into one continuous one night stand after another. It might leave you feeling hollow and depressed. One night stands are fun if you’re single. They’re great if you’re not looking for any commitment. They’re fantastic if you find great sex every time. But they’re also complicated and messy. Understand that with every session, there are feelings involved and memories attached. Give yourself time between each one night stand to evaluate yourself. Enjoy yourself and live a full life.

Friday, May 30, 2014

5 Reasons Why Social Media Won’t Guarantee Sales

 
 
1.     Facebook Likes – You’ve made a film. You’ve written a book. You’ve done the one thing that so many people have never done. So what do you do next? Tell the world obviously. And the only way is through Facebook. Media planners and internet experts will tell you to start a Facebook page, start a personal group, and post on your own timeline. So you put up photos, reviews, columns, excerpts, illustrations, anything you can to tell the world what you’ve done. You promote your page. You spend shit loads of money in advertising and it will show you how many number of people the post has reached out to. You get more and more likes. But guess what? It isn’t going to guarantee sales.
 
2.     Twitter Re-tweets – A tweet is a thought written in 140 characters. But to get the maximum number of re-tweets you must write succinctly, intelligently, humorously and identify with the audience. Write what they think but can’t express in words that you can, and leave enough room for their few characters to fit in front of your tweet. It takes skill, practice, and constant effort to get that perfect tweet. And voila! You’ve achieved it and the Twitterati is going ballistic by re-tweeting you. It’s great for the ego to see that so many people have retweeted you, favourited it for future reference and your follower count has gone up by 10 people. But none of it will ever convert into your product being sold. It will not guarantee sales.
 
3.     Incessant Blogging– So you need more than just a photo or 140 characters to tell the world about what you’ve done. You’ve got to make them read about it! So you post reviews, photos, links and further quotes from the people who have loved your work on your blog. Then you share it on other social media sites. Phew! It’s out there man. People can read about your success and say, “Hey, that looks so interesting. I must drop everything I do and rush out to buy it.” Not going to happen! People will glance over your stuff in exactly six seconds and move on. All that blog posting isn’t going to guarantee sales.
 
4.     YouTube Videos – “Let’s make a video! That’s definitely get people to see our work and then we’ll be rich and famous. Yeah!” Said the entrepreneur who quit his job, found his niche, and then ended up as a pauper. Stop the dance around the room. Even if you’ve splurged on the YouTube video and put it up on a channel and posted it to all your friends, it’s not going to get people to buy your product. They may or may not watch the video. They may or may not subscribe to further videos from you. Do you even know what that subscribe button means? Exactly. It’s not going to guarantee sales.
 
5.     Whatsapp Groups – Oh what the hell, at least you can rely on your friends right? Wrong! Try it. Send your achievement to your Whatsapp group. Tell them to go watch that film, see the TV show, buy the book, go to your new store, buy your fashion brand, attend your event, or even spread the word about your new venture. From the 1000 people you will send it to, probably two will forward it. And one will do as you say. That one needs a favour from you in return. So your amazing friends might compliment you later, ask you how it went, and may even promise to help you in the future but for now, they’re not guaranteeing any sales.
The secret to what will guarantee sales lies in the next blog post! Coming soon!

Sunday, May 25, 2014

5 Rules to be a Great Parent

From Soul Space magazine
It is a misconception that as soon as you have a child, you’ll become great parents. Just because you can provide for your child and keep him safe and fed, doesn’t mean you’re the best parent in the world. I’ve heard from my friends “He’ll grow up anyway. Look at us. We turned out ok.” We forget that earlier times were simpler. I don't know everything about parenting. I learn as the days go by. But this is what I know so far:
1.     Have A Routine – Contrary to what you think, children do better when they’re in a routine than when they’re left to themselves. During school days, they must have a schedule which they should follow. Set a time for your child to wake up in the morning, eat, play, study, go to school, read, bathe, sleep. You must find a balance as well. And with each activity allow ten minutes for the child to get into it instead of forcing him to stick to the exact time. In between if, they want to watch an hour of TV or do something that’s different, allow them to do so. But only for an hour. And on non school days and vacations, let them enjoy themselves completely and not have a routine. They’ll appreciate the value of structure then when they grow up.
 
2.     Don’t Give In to Everything They Say – By buying your child everything he wants, or taking him to destinations across the world or letting him only enjoy high class restaurant food, you’re depriving your child of experiences from life. If he doesn’t get something from you now, he will deal with disappointment and it won’t affect him when he’s older. If he has only seen airports, he’ll never enjoy train travel and understand the concept completely. If you buy your child every toy then his expectation level in life rises and he’ll never be able to take rejection later.
 
3.     Listen & Give A Choice – Once a child turns 5 he has opinions, ideas and suggestions. Treat him like an individual. Consider them as a friend. Give them choices. “Would you like to sleep now so you can wake up early and have a shower? Or would you like to take a shower now so you can sleep in longer tomorrow morning?” Once you give your child choices they’ll understand that you’re respecting them. Listen to his suggestions. Implement them in front of him to see the results. Let them learn by showing them that their ideas could work or not. Be aware about his feelings. If he’s unhappy, figure out why and turn it around. You don’t need to always protect him, but understand he’s still a child and needs your support.
 
4.     Be Honest- Children remember everything. This is a hard lesson I learnt as I asked my 6 year old if her mama has done anything that Ana didn’t want. And she replied, “Yes, when I was three years old…”All I could do was roll my eyes and swear to myself that from now on I would be honest with her. Tell your children who you’re meeting, where you’re going, what work you do and sometimes even how you feel. You don’t need to break down in front of your children but you can easily say, “I’m sad today because my boss screamed at me. But I know I did something wrong so I’m going to work extra hard to make it right. Because I’m strong, like you!” You don’t need to go into details but you need to tell the truth so that when you ask them something, they’ll feel they can tell you the truth as well.
 
5.     Forcing Them to Be Someone They’re Not – So many times we ask our children, “Say hello to uncle.” Or we ask, “Be polite, go play with your friends.” Or even, “All the other children can do it, why can’t you try it as well?” We feel we want to make them stronger, tougher, confident, and ready for the world. When in fact, we’re doing just the opposite. Why are you forcing your child to play with someone he doesn’t want to play with? Just because you’re friends with the child’s parents doesn’t mean you should subject your child to be friends too. And if you’ve told your child not to talk to strangers, then he’s just listening to you by not talking to uncles and aunts he doesn’t know. Don’t send out mixed signals. Explain to him that he can say hello to your friends if he chooses. And if he still doesn’t speak to them, don’t be embarrassed by him and say, “He’s a shy child.” You can be proud of him and declare, “I’m sorry he doesn’t feel like talking because I’m sure he has something more important going on in his head.” And when you defend your child in front of people, he knows you’re on his side. And that’s the bond you want to create with your children. That’s being a responsible parent.

This article was printed in the Soul Space magazine in Indore by Tavleen Foundation.

Thursday, April 24, 2014

Advantage Love Book Review - Book Geeks Blogger

advantage love madhuri banerjee book reviewBy for Rupa Publications

 
I have read Madhuri Banerjee’s work before. It was much before we envisaged BookGeeks and thus, I never got a chance to post its review on our website. “Advantage Love” is way more complicated and demanding in terms of writing than “Losing My Virginity and Other Dumb Ideas” was, but I must say that, Madhuri has done a really good job out of it. When I sat down to read this book (with its charming title and beautiful cover design), I already had a preconceived notion in my mind; that which said that this book is going to be yet another of those, which proves the point – don’t judge a book by its cover (and title).
 
To say that Madhuri’s writing has matured over time would be a great understatement for she has conked-out all my notions and proved me (and I believe everybody else who read her first book) wrong. But more on that later; let’s get on with a hint of the story first. Trisha is a strong opinionated and independent girl from Lucknow, who comes to the city of Delhi for her formal education at the JNU (Jawaharlal Nehru University). She is a simple grounded girl who is leading a quite simple life until she meets Vedant Dheeraj Kirloskar, the debonair and effervescent son of a high standing Maharashtra politician. As Vedant tries his level best to win over Trisha, she too falls deeply for him.
 
As their college life progresses, so does their romance, but, life comes to a standstill when their college is over. Their relationship, with Vedant failing to give a firm commitment, fails to shed its status quo and falls over. Trisha is shattered, but nevertheless moves on, swearing to never fall in love again. But eight months down the line, she falls for Abhimanyu, a leading tennis star and a celebrity in the making. Both are in love but lead separate lives in separate places. As the curse of long distance befalls their relationship too, both are confused as ever. In amidst this confusion, Trisha comes across Vedant again and this time he wants her back too. So, who will Trisha choose? Her never ending flame Vedant or the compassionate Abhimanyu? To find out about Trisha’s final decision, do read the book.
 
I may not be able to tell you who would be Trisha’s choice, but I can surely tell you that, the book, in its entirety is indeed very interesting. A good plot, complimented by impressive characters is what makes the book so special and worth a good read. The language is kept simple and the narration in third person is indeed overwhelming. The writing style is simple, yet expressive, enabling instant connections with the readers. Thus, my verdict is clear. The book is surely the one to go after and I therefore, sincerely recommend it to all my readers.
 

Buy it here: http://www.flipkart.com/advantage-love/p/itmds3hgffrvnxqd?pid=9788129130020&otracker=from-search&srno=t_3&query=advantage+love&ref=20898c40-882c-412c-b296-6949602d9c6f

Monday, April 14, 2014

5 Rules of a Great Marriage

 
Somehow, the earlier generation got it right. The husband was the provider and the woman the nurturer. They had their roles defined, almost written in stone. There were no complications, no angry bouts over not understanding each other and definitely lesser divorces. Our generation is just lost in the field of relationships and when we think we know everything, we decide to settle down and get married and make the other person as confused as us. With the rate of divorce in 2010 as high as one in four couples in India, people are grappling to figure out what to do to have a healthy marriage. Here are a few tips.
1.    Communicate Positively– Don’t just talk to each other about what you did in the day, your bosses’ angst, the traffic problems, your children’s school issues and the deadlines you need to finish this weekend. It’s all boring! Share what excited you about your day. Convey how you accomplished your dream today or how you overcame a difficulty in office. Share some gossip about friends you overheard. Explain a new problem you might need your partner’s help with. Speak about how your partner made you proud that day. Express effusively. Be generous in your compliments. Your partner wants to make you proud. Do not overdo so he/ she will not care after a while. Some days while your partner is in office or out of town, correspond through messages or emails a fantasy you have about him, click a photo of yourself and send it to him saying you are missing your better half right there and even say a simple “I love you.” Hearing those words and feeling that you are wanted in your partner’s life helps you stay connected. Indulge in a little sex talk. Be naughty and wild. Routine communication can come once a week when you are both lounging at home.  
2.    Book a Hotel – So you and your partner are working like crazy. You are juggling your career and managing children. It is tough and you need a break just to unwind and reconnect with your partner. If every weekend results in sitting in front of the television, having dinner with friends or playing with the children, you need to take a vacation. Not a big vacation of a few weeks that you have planned in summer, but a mini vacation for a night. You need to leave the kids with responsible adults/ family members who can look after them and check yourself in to a hotel. Go on Sat morning and check out on Sunday. Just a day’s break from the minutiae of daily domesticity and work deadlines can rejuvenate you. Do not put on the TV in the hotel room but use the facilities of a pool to lounge together or swim together and spend time walking around the premises. Connect with your partner physically and mentally. Get a couple’s spa. Do this on a regular basis where sometimes he makes a booking and sometimes you pay for it. Both of you will come back refreshed.
3.    Participate – You like capoeira, he likes reading. You like partying every evening, he likes having single malt with his friends. You like cleaning, he is a slob. You have different tastes, different backgrounds, and different groups of friends. How do you combine to have a healthy couple life? The thing is you can’t most of the times. You have to let each other be to enjoy what they like doing most. Nevertheless, this doesn’t mean you can’t share in their activities. For every three times you or he does something, the other person has to be with you on that activity once. So if you’ve gone partying with your friends three times, the fourth time he needs to go with you. Then you must not include other people and just spend an evening with him alone. If he has gone golfing three times, you must go with him the fourth time. Even if you sit and cheer him on from the stands. We need to participate in each other’s lives. We cannot live in a bubble content with who we are. We married so that the other person completed us in some way and we need to make an effort to grow and learn from each other. The only way we can do this is by trying to be happy with the other’s hobbies and learning a bit more about it.
4.    Work, Space & Internet – Most of us are in a rat race of some kind. We want to work hard, earn well, and retire early. Therefore, we work like maniacs. We often forget that the people who we are working for need more time and attention from us than the things that we buy them. Finding the balance seems to be extremely difficult. Moreover, what most of us want at the end of a day is space and on the weekends some peace. We live in a world where we connect with people every day but find it difficult to connect with our spouse. So we can use the web to connect with them. Have a steamy twitter relationship, send some encouraging words on his Facebook dp, Whatsapp him about stuff you did. We have to start supporting our spouses in their dreams, the lives they want for us, their hopes and only then will they support us back. Marriage is teamwork. You give and you will get back. Just don’t expect it. It will happen when you least anticipate it.
5.    Commitment - Many of us get married because our parents want us to. Some get married because they think it’s the “correct time” and a few to procreate. Marriage is an extremely strong bond that two individuals choose for themselves. It’s a commitment for life to look after that person because now they are your family. Many of us give up easily. We feel we’ve done enough. The spouse doesn’t “get” us anymore. The love, understanding, consideration is gone. We even find someone who we have a spark with! All marriages are the same. At some time, the passion will die. At some point neither of you will understand each other nor love each other. And you will want to move on. This is the time when you need to hold on even more. Your boat of marriage is going through a rocky patch of tumultuous waters and you both need to hold on to the boat, if not each other to get past it. This could take a few months, even a few years. But when you do come out, you will be stronger and wiser. Many people will find that spark with you. You are a scintillating person. Show it off to your spouse and fall in love with each other all over again.
 

Reserved for One: A poem

We don't trust enough We don't pour out our hearts  Telling all our secrets, our fears and surrendering to each other. Comple...