10 Time Management Tips For Working Mothers

 

Ever since my child started going to an early morning school, I've had to wake her up early and get her to class on time. This has been quite some effort since she has been waking up for the last four years of her life at a leisurly time of 9am! So I've finally figured out how to balance it out as I'm a working mother and can't afford to be lackadaisical about TIME!

Here are a few tips I'd like to share with fellow mothers:

Time Management Tips:

1.       Food planning – if you buy your groceries once a week nad stock your fridge, plan a menu for the week for your cook or yourself with healthy snacks, and mini indulgences, you are 50% sorted with your life. What you eat and your family eats can be more time consuming than you think. If your children and staff know what to eat through the day, then even if you’re outside or at work, they will not be too fussed and neither will you on whether they are eating correctly.

2.       Structure your day – Make lists of what is a) Top Priority and b) Can be done later c) Can be postponed. Example  - Stay at home moms need to get a leaking faucet fixed as priority A. Giving a baby a bath can be postponed by a few hours if there are too many things to do. And dropping clothes to a dry cleaner can be postponed till when you’re ready. Working mothers can do the same with their work.

3.       Delegating – You can’t do everything by yourself. You need help. Everyone agrees you’re superwoman. Now give yourself a break. Hire a nanny, cook, driver, maid, get a family member to help, request your spouse, join a support group, find other mothers, babysitters, etc. There are plenty of ways to make your life a little easier. It might mean spending a little extra money but it will give you tremendous peace and help you relax. Your peace of mind is more important than those extra hundreds of rupees that you will shell out for help. It will keep you positive and make your child a better person as well.

4.       Say No – Refuse to attend parties, family functions, lunches, dinners, extra meetings, etc if you’re already stressed. Someone’s cousin’s cousin is getting married and they’e sent you a card doesn’t mean you need to attend. They’ll understand that you’re trying to manage a child and work. You don’t owe anyone anything. Send a gift later if they’re close to you.

5.       Car ready – Keep an extra set of things in your car. Keep handy healthy bars for children, packets of biscuits, bananas, and other food items that are not perishable in a few days in your car. Don’t keep water bottles. Water needs to be kept fresh every day. An extra diaper bag with baby’s clothes, pampers, bibs, bottles, etc can be kept in the car. Or a children’s extra set of clothes, shoes, wet wipes, a packet of biscuits, books, colouring paper and pencils. Also keep an umbrella. Keep a set of formal clothes for yourself as well. That way if your kids are in the car or you’re going to work but have forgotten something in the morning in the mad rush, you have an extra supply and are not worried about returning home to collect it. Make sure you replenish the items used in the evening when you get home.

6.       Night Baths – If you have a late rising child who takes forever to get ready before school, bathe the children at night and put them in clean, fresh clothes to sleep. In the morning, you can busrh their teeth, wash their faces, put some powder and send them to school if it’s too early in the morning. This way they have taken a bath at the end of the day when they’ve sweat and got grimy from playing outside and you save some time in the morning from this chore.

7.       Switch off electronics – There are mails coming in, bbms, chats, twitter, facebook updates, etc that are continuously happening every day. You need to put your phone on silent while you finish getting ready and getting your child ready. If you start answering to everything in the morning, your stress level will rise and you will definitely forget something. Keep it on silent till you’ve got a little free time after your kid has gone to do your work.

8.       Make it Fun – Put on your favourite music while waking up. Get your child to groove to a familiar beat when she’s getting ready. Currently my child is listening to Cocktail songs and loves to get up and dance a bit before she has her glass of milk. I give her that extra five minutes so she’s happy doing what she wanted to and I don’t need to push her to do something.

9.       Leave the Mess – By hanging all the towels, putting the clothes back in the cupboard, aligning shoes, rearranging books you’re not going to do yourself a favour. If your house looks like a mess in the morning, let it be. You’re not having visitors drop in and assess you for cleanliness. You have a job to do. So focus on that. Clear the mess later.

10. Work the Internet – Pay your bills online. Figure out if there are any services that can deliver things or pick up items. Try to do as much shopping as you can online. The remainder you should keep for the weekend. Bank work, doctor appointments, etc that need to be done personally can be done on a Saturday while someone is looking after your children.

Love Guru Advice: Diamonds are a girl's best friend

Dear Love Guru,

I have been married for 8 years and my husband has never bought me any jewelry. At the time of wedding, I got one small ring from his side and a thin gold necklace. Now that he is earning, shouldn’t he get me something?

Yours

Kaaya

Dear Kaaya,

What? You didn’t get any sets from your husband? No polki, diamonds, kundan or emeralds? This is just shocking! I’m kidding of course! An austere wedding is a beautiful and rare one. But now, that your husband is earning well and you’ve dedicated 8 years of your life being a devoted wife, you deserve some pretty pieces! Please go ahead and ask politely, remind him of your love and use any ploy you can to get what you want. You can also save some money and buy something nice for yourself. The pleasure you will get in buying your own jewelry matches nothing that a man can give you. It offers you a sense of liberation and independence. Also remember that if your husband is the only earning member of your house, maybe most of the income is going in household expenditure, children’s schooling and maybe even vacations with probably just a little kept for life savings. If there is sufficient after all expenses, use your prudence to ask at a convenient time when he is most happy and calm. At the end of the day, you have a man who loves you. That in itself is worth tons of gold!

http://www.deccanchronicle.com/tabloid/others/remind-him-your-love-583

Asian Age Column: Husband Cheated On Me

Dear Love Guru,

My husband cheated on me and now that it’s over with the other woman, he wants to come back to me. Should I take him back?

Angry,

Anita

Dear Anita,

Forgiveness is the most divine virtue. But I can understand you’re outraged and upset. I would recommend you don’t go with your heart on this problem. Use your head instead. Is he a good husband? Does he provide for you? Is he a good father? Are you both loving and caring towards each other? If you feel this indiscretion was just a one-night affair, let him back into your home with a condition that you both will go seek a marriage counselor to make it work. If it was an emotional affair that lasted many months/years, let him see a therapist and then both of you see a counselor together. He has to respect you not to do it again. Communicate to each other and don’t keep bringing the topic up if you see he’s trying to make a difference. Start from scratch and woo each other again. Value each other! If nothing works, separate and find a new life rid of guilt and unhappiness. If both of you have tried everything to save the marriage and you’re still unhappy, it’s better to find peace separately than waste a life. Each of you deserves to be loved wholeheartedly and maybe some distance will put perspective not to take each other for granted again.

Asian Age Column : To have a kid or not?

Dear Love Guru,

My husband travels a lot for work and we stay alone. Everyone is now pressurizing me to have children. I have just turned 30. I feel I will probably be raising this kid on my own if I decide to have it. On the other hand, I might be too old once things settle down. What should I do?

Confused,

Saira

Dear Saira,

30 is young! Please stop letting people get to you! Motherhood is a wonderful experience but balancing work and motherhood can be tough if you have to do it alone. Once you get pregnant, you’ll need to hire a full time nanny who can look after the baby even if your husband stops traveling. Ask your mom/mother in law if they can help once you deliver. Figure out your finances for medical expenses & your work situation. Do a medical check up to see if you and your partner are healthy. Then take the time to think if you really want it or you’re doing it to make someone happy. Ideally 30 or before is great to have children since your body recovers faster and you have enough energy to run after the kids. But there’s nothing that says you can’t have your kid at 35 or even 40 if your body allows it. It just gets a little tougher. Your husband might always travel and not “settle” down. Be prepared to be the main caregiver for the baby for the rest of your life. Then enjoy trying to make a baby!

Mistakes Like Love And Sex : The blurb is out!

Just got my copy of the Penguin catalogue that discusses the releases from July to December 2012. So happy to see this large photo of me on page 64. Penguin and I are still grappling with what the cover should look like. But the sequel to Losing My Virginity And Other Dumb Ideas is called Mistakes Like Love And Sex and it's slated for an October 3rd release.

I hope it won't coincide with other big authors like Sidin, Amitav Ghosh, Meenakshi and a few Penguin writer friends. Like they say in the movies, "the film needs a clean run" which means at least one week without any other release to become a box office hit.

It also needs word of mouth to sell. With so many books just from Penguin releasing this year, a word of mouth will only help make one book a best seller and another an average sales. I pray every day that my book lives up to the expectations and makes it to the best seller list over and over again. It's been a tumultuous year in more ways than one. I'm hoping the sequel will be the bright light at the end of the tunnel.

My Interview in the Femina magazine: June Issue.

Love Guru Advice : Wedding Night Jitters

Dear Love Guru,

I’m getting married next week and I’m having the wedding jitters. I’m still a virgin and don’t know how to approach my husband. What if he laughs at me? Pl help.

Truly Nervous,

Bindiya

Dear Bindiya

It is normal to be nervous and anxious about your wedding night. But you should stop being afraid of the act. First, tell your husband that you’re a virgin and to be gentle. Second, get into the mood of the act. Buy some lubricants for yourself. Light some candles around the room. Wear a soft, satin negligee. If you can think that you’re going to have fun, you probably will. Third, don’t do any stunts that you may have seen in movies, videos or read about. Let him take the lead for now. Be comfortable with your husband. Start with lots of foreplay – kissing, cuddling, touching, necking, stroking. Don’t be afraid to explore his body and let him explore yours. Ease into the act. Don’t tense up. Preferably, don’t have people swarming around your bedroom door! Let them all go away before you begin. Remember the first time will be a little difficult and there may be some discomfort. Try again till you get into a rhythm and let your body go with the flow. Sex is a great way to connect with your husband and you’ll soon love it! P.S – Even if he does laugh, laugh with him. It’s supposed to be fun and the first time is awkward for everyone!